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Bringing out the rockstar in all of us
Oct 18, 2022
How often do we bring 'the other me' to work?
Last week I left my home office in our quiet Kent village and stepped into a different world, spending 2 days at the celebrated Cheltenham Literature Festival. I spoke on a panel about the future of work at a breakfast event alongside Johanna Thomas Corr, incoming Literary Editor of The Sunday Times, and Lizzie Penny, joint CEO of Hoxby and co-author of Workstyle. Between events I got to hang out in the Writers’ Tent - picture squishy leather sofas, free food and drink and lively book chatter - with far more famous and celebrated writers than me. I loved it all: speaking, seeing my book in the Waterstones book tent, signing copies, listening to other talks and chatting to attendees. A friend commented amusingly to me afterwards about my ‘rockstar’ life, and indeed it did feel a little like being a rockstar for 48 hours, minus the entourage and air guitar. It was exciting and invigorating to let this other 'me' out.
The following day normal life resumed, complete with the school run and hanging out the washing. As I pegged up the seemingly endless line of socks, I pondered: how much time do we invest in the other ‘me’s? How often do we get to explore different sides to our personalities, practice different skills, try out new experiences, wear a different image to our usual one, and meet different people in new settings? How much are we limited by our ‘usual’ routine, environment and yes, our ingrained expectations of ourself?
It also made me question how much of ‘the other me’ we share with others at work. I recall an interview at the start of my consulting career when I was in my 20’s in which I talked about having a ‘professional’ self and a ‘personal’ self and how I presented only certain aspects of my persona to colleagues and clients at work. I was never sure if that was an advantgeous or disadvantageous thing to confess to! But for some years I certainly hid some aspects of my personality and interests in order to fit into the perceived mould, although I've gradually overcome that as I've become older and care less about fitting in.
As a writer and adviser on creating diverse, healthy, productive work cultures where everyone can flourish, I’m professionally interested in this question too. What stops us from bringing our full identity to work? From trying out different skills or interests during our careers? Remote working during lockdowns gave employers unprecedented insights into our private worlds outside of the office and by extension our fuller personalities, our hobbies and our home lives. One positive consequence is that employers are now recognising more openly that we are multi-faceted humans with commitments and interests outside of our day job, and many are embracing more inclusive working practices and norms that help us to be more open with colleagues and clients about our circumstances, ambitions and constraints.
But how much time do we spend on finding out about these other sides to our colleagues? In our high speed, long hours work culture we typically value task accomplishment more than interpersonal curiosity – and we have to stop pounding the work treadmill in order to enquire, listen, empathise and appreciate. But these behaviours are exactly the ones that help create strong, connected communities characterised by high levels of mutual trust, openness and support. Not only is this social connection the aspect of office life that we’ve been missing the most, according to this recent Microsoft study, but also it boosts wellbeing, belonging, creativity and those elusive higher levels of productivity (defined here as better quality outputs in less time).
Some ways organisations can signal that bringing ‘the other me’ to work is encouraged and celebrated are:
1. Allowing people to invest time in ‘passion projects’ for a few hours per week/month
2. Recognising people’s contribution to running/supporting employee networks and other community-oriented initiatives in their job design and performance objectives
3. Participating in group challenges or shared fundraising activities
4. Setting up crowdsourcing tools via which people can pool their brainpower and experience drawn from external activities to help problem-solve or generate ideas
5. Encouraging storytelling about different lived experiences and career ‘ups and downs’.
6. Bringing in speakers from very different industries or disciplines
As individuals, we can invite more disclosure from our colleagues and learn more about them are by asking:
• What does your ideal day off look like?
• What unfulfilled ambitions do you have?
• Tell me about something or someone you’re really proud of?
And some questions we can reflect on ourselves are:
• What have I not devoted time to lately? (that I am missing)
• What side of me have I kept hidden away?
• What mode do colleagues/family usually see me in at work/at home?
This way, we’re more likely to discover and enjoy the hidden rockstars around us at work, and in our circles outside of work. And we might get to enjoy that rockstar feeling ourselves for more than a day or two.
The following day normal life resumed, complete with the school run and hanging out the washing. As I pegged up the seemingly endless line of socks, I pondered: how much time do we invest in the other ‘me’s? How often do we get to explore different sides to our personalities, practice different skills, try out new experiences, wear a different image to our usual one, and meet different people in new settings? How much are we limited by our ‘usual’ routine, environment and yes, our ingrained expectations of ourself?
It also made me question how much of ‘the other me’ we share with others at work. I recall an interview at the start of my consulting career when I was in my 20’s in which I talked about having a ‘professional’ self and a ‘personal’ self and how I presented only certain aspects of my persona to colleagues and clients at work. I was never sure if that was an advantgeous or disadvantageous thing to confess to! But for some years I certainly hid some aspects of my personality and interests in order to fit into the perceived mould, although I've gradually overcome that as I've become older and care less about fitting in.
As a writer and adviser on creating diverse, healthy, productive work cultures where everyone can flourish, I’m professionally interested in this question too. What stops us from bringing our full identity to work? From trying out different skills or interests during our careers? Remote working during lockdowns gave employers unprecedented insights into our private worlds outside of the office and by extension our fuller personalities, our hobbies and our home lives. One positive consequence is that employers are now recognising more openly that we are multi-faceted humans with commitments and interests outside of our day job, and many are embracing more inclusive working practices and norms that help us to be more open with colleagues and clients about our circumstances, ambitions and constraints.
But how much time do we spend on finding out about these other sides to our colleagues? In our high speed, long hours work culture we typically value task accomplishment more than interpersonal curiosity – and we have to stop pounding the work treadmill in order to enquire, listen, empathise and appreciate. But these behaviours are exactly the ones that help create strong, connected communities characterised by high levels of mutual trust, openness and support. Not only is this social connection the aspect of office life that we’ve been missing the most, according to this recent Microsoft study, but also it boosts wellbeing, belonging, creativity and those elusive higher levels of productivity (defined here as better quality outputs in less time).
Some ways organisations can signal that bringing ‘the other me’ to work is encouraged and celebrated are:
1. Allowing people to invest time in ‘passion projects’ for a few hours per week/month
2. Recognising people’s contribution to running/supporting employee networks and other community-oriented initiatives in their job design and performance objectives
3. Participating in group challenges or shared fundraising activities
4. Setting up crowdsourcing tools via which people can pool their brainpower and experience drawn from external activities to help problem-solve or generate ideas
5. Encouraging storytelling about different lived experiences and career ‘ups and downs’.
6. Bringing in speakers from very different industries or disciplines
As individuals, we can invite more disclosure from our colleagues and learn more about them are by asking:
• What does your ideal day off look like?
• What unfulfilled ambitions do you have?
• Tell me about something or someone you’re really proud of?
And some questions we can reflect on ourselves are:
• What have I not devoted time to lately? (that I am missing)
• What side of me have I kept hidden away?
• What mode do colleagues/family usually see me in at work/at home?
This way, we’re more likely to discover and enjoy the hidden rockstars around us at work, and in our circles outside of work. And we might get to enjoy that rockstar feeling ourselves for more than a day or two.
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Cup of tea and large slice of cake in hand. 5. Saying yes to coffees and phone calls with friends even when work and life feel too busy and I’m tempted to say ‘not this week’. I never regret making the time. Why not ask the same question to colleagues in your team? Your close friends or family? It might spark a new kind of conversation. And you might well discover that your future has already arrived.
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