Behind the sparkle

26 May 2023
How often do you doubt what you’re doing, or get discouraged?

Tina Turner, the legendary singer who died this week, overcame well-documented hardships throughout her life to enjoy huge global success. I heard on the Today programme yesterday (starts at 2h 38m) that when asked by Oprah Winfrey in 2013 to describe her legacy, Tina replied ‘My legacy is that I stayed on course from the beginning to the end because I believed in something inside of me that told me that you can get better, or you can make something better, and that I wanted better’.  

We're not all Tina Turners, but her words are powerful. Towards the end of last year, I met up with an old friend I’d not seen in person for some time and who has worked for big businesses all of her career, progressing to a very senior role and managing a busy home life with children as well.  To my amazement she told me she was deeply impressed by my entrepreneurship, profile and achievements since setting up my own business and that in comparison, she felt she had just trodden the corporate path in a far less exciting way.  Whilst very touched by this, I was quite thrown by her comment.

Because the truth is, I’ve frequently wondered whether I’m doing the right thing and even whether anyone has noticed what I’m up to (there, I’ve aired my inner critic’s favourite jibe publicly).  In this blog I’m finally coming out of my ‘self-doubt closet’ and confessing all. I’ve probably worked harder than I’ve ever worked before since setting up solo, spending 9 months writing my book, another 7 months finalising it and preparing to launch it, a further 15 months (and counting) post-launch promoting it, speaking, writing and podcasting about it.  It has been a huge investment of my time and energy, and yes, I’ve pondered on a weekly basis what I’m getting back on that investment.

It's all too easy to compare ourselves to others in similar lines of work and to unhelpfully measure ourselves up against their external indicators of success and find ourselves coming up short.  Believe me, authors building their businesses are just as prone to this as any other professional!  There’s a whole raft of measures that can stoke our insecurity, including:

•    How many print runs your book has had
•    How high profile your speaking opportunities are
•    Whether you’ve landed any bookshop signings and events
•    Whether you’ve licensed any foreign language editions of your book
•    What media coverage and appearances you’ve garnered
•    How many positive online ratings and reviews your book has

I could go on.  But what I’m learning is that book success (for which read: any kind of professional or career success) comes in many forms and flavours, and each of us follows our own path.  As authors we helpfully swap ideas and learn from what each other is doing, which I hugely appreciate, but unless we’re Margaret Heffernan or Malcom Gladwell, we’re unlikely to be ticking all the boxes off the ‘Global Business Book Success’ checklist.

Sure there are the shiny moments that we celebrate publicly but for every one of those there are hundreds of hours of invisible graft behind the scenes.  That’s one reason why, when I hit 2 years of daily running in November last year on an unusually bright day, I chose not to post a sunshiney celebratory photo of me out running with my husband, but instead I posted this photo of me out running alone the next day in the rain. Because that was the reality beind the big milestones.

Don’t get me wrong. I do feel very proud of what I’ve accomplished so far and it felt great to put my gladrags on last week and celebrate with other published authors as finalists at the Business Book Awards 2023.   And it was utterly amazing to hear my name and my book’s title read out as winner in the People, Culture & Management category! Thank you to all who have commented on and celebrated this achievement with me on Linked In and in real life.  (If you missed the news last week, my Insta reel has the highlights). My May newsletter is an unusually joyous edition. But as I float gently back down from cloud nine, it’s back to normality and writing this blog, updating my website, following up with clients enquiring about my talks, workshops and coaching programmes, booking in podcast guests and preparing my VAT return.

Because it’s putting the effort in every day, come rain or shine, that moves us forward; that grows our business or our book’s reach bit by tiny painstaking bit, each and every day.  Success for me is just as much about the ‘keeping on going’ as it is about the occasional celebratory or highly visible moments that come along.  If you’ve been plodding away at something in your work life, feeling like it’s slow going, or if you’ve been admiring other people’s successes, then this message is for you:
    
If you love what you do, if it you believe in it, and if you can afford to keep doing it, then don’t give up.  As the saying goes, if it was easy then we’d all be doing it all of the time. The harder the effort and the longer the wait, the more rewarding that moment of success feels, as a wise teacher once gently explained to my 9 year old daughter who was sobbing after failing yet again to win her first ever medal at a school sports day.  

I like the way James Cleare, author of Atomic Habits, puts it: ‘complaining about not achieving success despite working hard is like complaining about an ice cube not melting when you heated it from 21 to 31 degrees. Your work is not wasted; it is just being stored. All the action happens at 32 degrees’.

So when you’re full of doubt and feeling like you’re pushing water uphill, remember that to someone else your hard graft looks like enviably shiny success. And good things will come. So don’t give up.


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2 December 2025
How far ahead do you typically think ? ‘Festive creep’ is a thing apparently, with the festive decorations, shopfronts and marketing campaigns officially starting earlier than ever before. (I ate my first mince pie on the last day of November – have I fallen prey too?). This seems to me to be another indication of how impatient and hurried we have become, always in a rush for the next arrival, to start the next new initiative at work or hit the next deadline, and in parallel our attention has become chopped up into ever-smaller increments in our rush to acquire, achieve and advance. I’m pondering how we can counterbalance our short-term, hyper-fast focus with a slowing down to help us take more in, look further ahead and expand our thinking. I’m as guilty of myopic busyness as anyone. 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My exasperated husband put it more bluntly, ‘yes we need to unblock the kitchen drain for the housesitters but a new rug for the sitting-room is NOT a priority!’ When I was researching for People Glue , I spoke to 25 or so CEOs, COOs and CPOs , many of whom talked about looking at their business through 2 lenses: one eye on daily operations and short-term results, the other on longer-term ‘moonshots’ that anticipated potential future developments and built organisational capability for tomorrow. Each lens brought insights and a counterbalancing view to the other. Individuals generally want the same in their lives too; to manage, on the one hand, the day-to-day load (at work and home) as efficiently and productively as possible whilst planning their next pay rise, promotion, job move, house refurbishment, holiday or family addition. They’re also zooming out to think about what matters most to them today and how this might evolve in the future. Even those who take a fairly spontaneous approach to their career opportunities hold firm to a set of longer-term beliefs and values that form a career compass guiding their decisions - listen to my podcast conversation with tech CEO Soulaima Gourani to hear how she does this brilliantly. I was fascinated to read at the weekend about the creation of a Clock of the Long Now (FT £, or here ), designed to measure the passing of 10,000 years. Located deep in a remote Texan mountain, it will confound our expectations of a clock by ticking once a year, chiming once a century and trumpeting a cuckoo once a millenium. All without winding and parts replacements. The same day, I listened to author and computer science professor Cal Newport talk about the lost art of long thinking on his podcast. He defines long thinking as ‘the persistent intentional application of your brain when you’re trying to create something new’ and points out how sustained attention is critical for long thinking. But thanks to smartphones, instant gratification and short-form ultra-digestible entertainment, we’ve lost the habit of thinking for ourselves and spend less time reading longer texts, reflecting, and writing as form of thinking. The renowned psychologist Daniel Kahneman shed light on our 2 speeds of thinking in his remarkable book Thinking Fast and Slow . We slip comfortably into fast thinking thanks to our cognitive biases and shortcuts, entrenched assumptions and easily-recalled (but incomplete or unreliable) data. It’s more effortful to engage in slow thinking – like writing with your non-dominant hand - because the latter requires sustained attention, the search for alternative perspectives and an exploration of the unfamiliar. I have a thirst for books, reading, bookshops and libraries that I’m belatedly learning is a powerful antidote to the short-term busyness and task accomplishment that I’ve become so used (addicted?) to. 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